The Home Life

Do you get any sleep? Well, yes. If I didn’t sleep I’d probably die, right? The thing is, when you have a new baby, you do get sleep. You just wake up way more often, and if you’re lucky you kinda sleep even when you’re awake, so you can add that into your sleep time that night, too. Having a tiny helpless human at home is the craziest thing ever. Your days are all one big blur and you laugh sometimes and you get to smile when you look at your baby and other than that it’s yawns, maybe some in-sync crying with the baby, eating whenever your in-laws bring you food, and lots of counting dirty diapers and figuring out why this baby is crying. You get visitors you didn’t even know you really knew, and if you’re like me, you luck out with a friend who knows EVERYTHING about breastfeeding and babies and saves your life for the first three weeks. Seriously, it’s scary hard. Then, all of a sudden you get the hang of it. Everyone from out-of-town leaves, husband goes back to work, you’re not so scared of pooping anymore and you’re like WHOA. This. Is. Life. There’s this little thing you made inside of your guts and it just rules your life and screams at you and you do exactly what it wants some how. I co-sleep, and no, I don’t think I can sleep hard enough where I can crush my baby to death, trust me. But cuddling this little tiny thing every night is bliss. You look over at your husband snoring and farting and you’re like, how did I ever cuddle that and enjoy it when I could have been cuddling this tiny adorable human who also snores and farts, but in a way cuter fashion. You also have the friends. They come over after work around 7pm, which by the way is night-time. It’s not the evening anymore, that’s straight up bedtime. They bring wine, or beer, and expect so much more out of this visit and you’re just sitting there with your cute baby and you look like you’ve been binge drinking for a month, and it hurts when you sit so you carry a pillow around, and you have to feed the baby every 10 minutes (not really) so you keep disappearing, but you’re totally fine because that means you get to nap for a good ten minutes before you have to back out and act like you’re still a functioning human. You sit there wondering when you get to go back to your bed and just lay down and you look up at the clock and your friends haven’t even been there for an hour so you tough it out, but then you get sad when they leave and start wondering if 8pm is your new bedtime and when did you get spit up on and why didn’t anyone tell you. So much happens physically and emotionally, then you feel something warm on your lap and realize you’ve been pee’d on and you forget those thoughts and you’re sucked right back into motherhood just like that. Four months go by and your home smells like a baby. Even candles can’t take that away, but the day my home stops smelling like baby I know I’ll be so sad and miss getting pooped on. Who would’ve thought.





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